I graduated from East. I earned my associates degree. There was no hoopla.There were no tacky balloons. There was no cheering. There was no “I’m so proud” moments. I never walked across the stage. I graduated and that’s what was important. I received my diploma in the mail and felt really awkward when my husband went out, purchased a diploma frame and hung it on the wall with his degrees from Mississippi State and Mississippi College. It simply felt weird.
I had worked for this. I had worked hard taking classes, night classes, online classes, everything I could fit in. Yet I was embarrassed that all the work I’d put in, this was all I had to show for it. Embarrassed that in the time it’s taken my husband to get a masters, I’d only achieved an associates. Yes, I had worked full time and he had the luxury of going back to school and focusing solely on school. Yet still I was ashamed.
I should have been proud to say yes I did it. Yes it took me longer but I did it. I finished. Yet, I wasn’t.
This is a stepping stone. This is not my goal.
I was accepted into my program at State last week. I am still not impressed. I’m still not ready to celebrate. I’ll celebrate that degree hanging on my wall. I don’t want the hoopla, I want the result of my work.